Think Tanks are soooooooooo much Fun!!
The weekend is over – and the “conference” was a whole load of fun – and exceeded my expectations in a HUGE way.
If anyone – and I mean anyone – ever needs a motivational speaker, Derek is your man! Contact me for details!
That said the following was the fun parts!
Friday night I got toasted! Not just small small – really toasted. I ended up wandering along the beach at some godforsaken hour looking for the local “coffee” shop. When I had bumped into the person next to me for the third time, we both finally realized we were not “walking proper”. I would have loved to have seen the foot prints in the sand the following day.
We ended up losing Jeri from the coffee shop and wandered around pissed for around an hour until Jeri was found sleeping on two chairs at the Hotel.
Saturday required copious amounts of water to “rehydrate”
We were accosted by the local butterfly – aka hooker – at the hotel. My feeble attempt to set up Derek failed dismally. All it did was make the butterfly want to talk to me. When mentioning that I was Gay and Gerick was my boyfriend, there were two responses.
The first was Gerick’s eyes widening in horror! Gerick is a mans man… and I think inferring he was gay did not compute. The second was the butterfly toddling up to Gerick and asking “So you fuck him in the Anus?” Which in its own way increased the level of shock on Gerick’s face. All was saved by Kerry “The Butterfly Exterminator” who promptly proceeded to say to said butterfly that all the lads there were her’s and she was bought up from South Africa to service them. (I wonder if that is classified as a perk for tax purposes). A quiet comment to security resolved the matter permanently.
Derek used his shock tactics in the morning to get us out of an alcohol induced stupor and the team building day was good. You have to love a guy who uses “fucking your girlfriend” as part of an opening statement.
Saturday night was more of the same – with loads of beer and captains supped. More trips to the coffee shop and discussions on Trance Music – which the Rasta had in his CD collection – Quantum Physics and Viagra made the night fly by. It amazes me that I can actually discuss Quantum Physics when my brain has disconnected from my feet.
We also sang a load of songs on the walk back. Refer previous post about why I should be sent home when I sing.
Once again copious quantities of water was required on the Sunday. Copious!!
We had a fun session whereby the team sits in a circle and everyone has a chance to comment on each other. Open with no fear of recrimination. Yeah Right! *chuckle*
Asamoah waxed lyrical to everyone and even threw in a bit of self praise as he went along for ages and ages. We finally finished at 6:30 pm.
One thing I did realize was that I have made a difference to the team here, and that is most satisfying. Sides – they had to say nice stuff about the boss. – Hehehe
Sunday Night – I drank water…. Only water and was fast asleep at 9:30. Of course I was wide awake at 12:30am which did not help. A walk on the beach and some late night TV assisted in sending me back to the land of Nod at around 3pm. (Oh yes – and some pawn to induce sleep – male way)
We got back to Tarkwa at around 12 to all sorts of issues and the fact that the entire management team was not there on a Monday morning also meant that half the workforce took the day off as well. I was not happy….. not happy at all. Tomorrow could be a fun workforce meeting.
Once a quarter a weekend at the beach means a lot to the lads – and me. We get all our guys together and frank talk goes a long way. Having an outside facilitator made sooo much difference. Money well spent!!
I know I came away all touchy feely good!
On Friday one of our trucks was traveling back to the workshop and a lil school girl walked into the side of it. Result: Driver arrested, truck impounded – until the cops realized the only way they were going to get the lighty to hospital was in the truck as they had no transport – and me cursing and swearing as this will cost us around GHC 10,000,000 (ZAR 7500) in “medical fees”.
Even if the pedestrian is a farking idjit in this country you are at fault. And you pay through your nose. Cost to date is GHC 5.000.000 and she has been transferred to Takoradi Hospital. (In my car of course!). The quacks here cannot even say if the ankle is broken and all I am waiting for, to make me really lose it, will be a letter from the hospital saying she requires a blood transfusion.
I love Africa……
On a brighter note – it is less than three weeks until I wing it home!!! Whoooooo Hooooooo. Get fit Nessers!!!
On a not so bright note – my increase in March turned into a Decrease: Apparently a lot of the increases were farked up. So I take home less money this month and because you work for a large company with a centalised payroll system – all I can do is hope that they correct it next month. Thank fark for overdrafts. Although I wonder if they will refund me the interest I pay due to their fuck up. I wonder if pigs will fly.
Month end week – crunch the numbers – make all ok with the clients and smile.
I must admit – Rum is horrible – I can smell myself today.
Hope you had a stunner of a weekend. Nessers did - Peas did not – TWA did not – Esther has no phone – and Rich had a bad Sunday.
If anyone – and I mean anyone – ever needs a motivational speaker, Derek is your man! Contact me for details!
That said the following was the fun parts!
Friday night I got toasted! Not just small small – really toasted. I ended up wandering along the beach at some godforsaken hour looking for the local “coffee” shop. When I had bumped into the person next to me for the third time, we both finally realized we were not “walking proper”. I would have loved to have seen the foot prints in the sand the following day.
We ended up losing Jeri from the coffee shop and wandered around pissed for around an hour until Jeri was found sleeping on two chairs at the Hotel.
Saturday required copious amounts of water to “rehydrate”
We were accosted by the local butterfly – aka hooker – at the hotel. My feeble attempt to set up Derek failed dismally. All it did was make the butterfly want to talk to me. When mentioning that I was Gay and Gerick was my boyfriend, there were two responses.
The first was Gerick’s eyes widening in horror! Gerick is a mans man… and I think inferring he was gay did not compute. The second was the butterfly toddling up to Gerick and asking “So you fuck him in the Anus?” Which in its own way increased the level of shock on Gerick’s face. All was saved by Kerry “The Butterfly Exterminator” who promptly proceeded to say to said butterfly that all the lads there were her’s and she was bought up from South Africa to service them. (I wonder if that is classified as a perk for tax purposes). A quiet comment to security resolved the matter permanently.
Derek used his shock tactics in the morning to get us out of an alcohol induced stupor and the team building day was good. You have to love a guy who uses “fucking your girlfriend” as part of an opening statement.
Saturday night was more of the same – with loads of beer and captains supped. More trips to the coffee shop and discussions on Trance Music – which the Rasta had in his CD collection – Quantum Physics and Viagra made the night fly by. It amazes me that I can actually discuss Quantum Physics when my brain has disconnected from my feet.
We also sang a load of songs on the walk back. Refer previous post about why I should be sent home when I sing.
Once again copious quantities of water was required on the Sunday. Copious!!
We had a fun session whereby the team sits in a circle and everyone has a chance to comment on each other. Open with no fear of recrimination. Yeah Right! *chuckle*
Asamoah waxed lyrical to everyone and even threw in a bit of self praise as he went along for ages and ages. We finally finished at 6:30 pm.
One thing I did realize was that I have made a difference to the team here, and that is most satisfying. Sides – they had to say nice stuff about the boss. – Hehehe
Sunday Night – I drank water…. Only water and was fast asleep at 9:30. Of course I was wide awake at 12:30am which did not help. A walk on the beach and some late night TV assisted in sending me back to the land of Nod at around 3pm. (Oh yes – and some pawn to induce sleep – male way)
We got back to Tarkwa at around 12 to all sorts of issues and the fact that the entire management team was not there on a Monday morning also meant that half the workforce took the day off as well. I was not happy….. not happy at all. Tomorrow could be a fun workforce meeting.
Once a quarter a weekend at the beach means a lot to the lads – and me. We get all our guys together and frank talk goes a long way. Having an outside facilitator made sooo much difference. Money well spent!!
I know I came away all touchy feely good!
On Friday one of our trucks was traveling back to the workshop and a lil school girl walked into the side of it. Result: Driver arrested, truck impounded – until the cops realized the only way they were going to get the lighty to hospital was in the truck as they had no transport – and me cursing and swearing as this will cost us around GHC 10,000,000 (ZAR 7500) in “medical fees”.
Even if the pedestrian is a farking idjit in this country you are at fault. And you pay through your nose. Cost to date is GHC 5.000.000 and she has been transferred to Takoradi Hospital. (In my car of course!). The quacks here cannot even say if the ankle is broken and all I am waiting for, to make me really lose it, will be a letter from the hospital saying she requires a blood transfusion.
I love Africa……
On a brighter note – it is less than three weeks until I wing it home!!! Whoooooo Hooooooo. Get fit Nessers!!!
On a not so bright note – my increase in March turned into a Decrease: Apparently a lot of the increases were farked up. So I take home less money this month and because you work for a large company with a centalised payroll system – all I can do is hope that they correct it next month. Thank fark for overdrafts. Although I wonder if they will refund me the interest I pay due to their fuck up. I wonder if pigs will fly.
Month end week – crunch the numbers – make all ok with the clients and smile.
I must admit – Rum is horrible – I can smell myself today.
Hope you had a stunner of a weekend. Nessers did - Peas did not – TWA did not – Esther has no phone – and Rich had a bad Sunday.
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