Press Reports
The press review today comes in with the following pearlers
A Ghana Prison Services officer was arrested by his colleagues for smuggling weed into the local prison. I am assuming “Rasta Weed” and no kakibos. The lad was duly locked up in the local police cells. Mortified at facing some quality time with the inmates he was “keeping under control”, the lad decided to take a “sharp object” and attempt to commit suicide. His method of suicide was such that bought a tear to my eye. He decided the best way to die was to cut off his manhood.
Now forgive me for crossing my legs as I write this. The poor bugger survived and is currently been treated at 37 Mil Hospital. He now faces time in the big house without his manhood, which was not reattached.
Methinks Bubba is rubbing his hands (and other parts) in glee awaiting his arrival.
Pres. Robert Mugabe clocks in at 82, Tuesday this week. In true African style his birthday was greeted with birthday wish supplements in the local press and State Radio playing songs praising Mugabe. One of the songs has lyrics as follows: “Let us praise President Mugabe. One day he will liberate the whole of Africa”
God I hope not! 500% inflation, no fuel, no food and Farmers with no money.
An MP has proposed a novel method to prevent deaths resulting from Mini Bus accidents. Her solution is to ban mini buses. I wonder how this will go down in South Africa if the same proposal was made….
The Police in Osu got a bit of a shock when they arrested 2 drivers and a mechanic for illegal parking. The problem arose due to the fact the mechanic was busy fixing the vehicle, a hearse: The hearse of course had a coffin inside complete with the mortal remains of some poor person.
A ruckus developed between the police and mourners, stones were thrown and people were arrested. The mourners that were not arrested decided the deceased was the cause of all the problems (evidently) and dropped said casket inside the charge office. Citizen’s arrest I think the term is. The police were reluctant to lock up the dead man and the article did not mention if the casket ever reached its final resting place.
Ghana Telecom announced – in a half page advert – that the area housing government ministry’s will have their service interrupted. This was to enable Telecom to carry out a “cabinet” cleaning exercise. The issue however is the duration of the interruption. 4 weeks!!! I wonder if this has anything to do with the large amounts outstanding on the ministry’s phone bills…. Time will tell – Oh yes – The interruption would commence on Monday 13th February 2006. The date published in the newspaper Thursday 23rd February 2006.
And finally – how not to get to heaven. Worshippers at the Seventh Day Adventist church in Brong Ahafo were shocked when a bailiff entered the church with a court order to lock up the church. A bailiff agreeing to take on the church is a brave man – or woman – indeed. A bailiff exercising a warrant to lock up a church while a church service is going on leaves the realm of brave and rapidly enters the realm of stupidity!
Methinks said bailiff will have some explaining to do when they look into the big book guarding the pearly gates.
And that dear reader is what grabbed me in the press today.
Needless to say I have a smile on my face.
I hope you have a hint of a smile as well….
Have a happy one!
A Ghana Prison Services officer was arrested by his colleagues for smuggling weed into the local prison. I am assuming “Rasta Weed” and no kakibos. The lad was duly locked up in the local police cells. Mortified at facing some quality time with the inmates he was “keeping under control”, the lad decided to take a “sharp object” and attempt to commit suicide. His method of suicide was such that bought a tear to my eye. He decided the best way to die was to cut off his manhood.
Now forgive me for crossing my legs as I write this. The poor bugger survived and is currently been treated at 37 Mil Hospital. He now faces time in the big house without his manhood, which was not reattached.
Methinks Bubba is rubbing his hands (and other parts) in glee awaiting his arrival.
Pres. Robert Mugabe clocks in at 82, Tuesday this week. In true African style his birthday was greeted with birthday wish supplements in the local press and State Radio playing songs praising Mugabe. One of the songs has lyrics as follows: “Let us praise President Mugabe. One day he will liberate the whole of Africa”
God I hope not! 500% inflation, no fuel, no food and Farmers with no money.
An MP has proposed a novel method to prevent deaths resulting from Mini Bus accidents. Her solution is to ban mini buses. I wonder how this will go down in South Africa if the same proposal was made….
The Police in Osu got a bit of a shock when they arrested 2 drivers and a mechanic for illegal parking. The problem arose due to the fact the mechanic was busy fixing the vehicle, a hearse: The hearse of course had a coffin inside complete with the mortal remains of some poor person.
A ruckus developed between the police and mourners, stones were thrown and people were arrested. The mourners that were not arrested decided the deceased was the cause of all the problems (evidently) and dropped said casket inside the charge office. Citizen’s arrest I think the term is. The police were reluctant to lock up the dead man and the article did not mention if the casket ever reached its final resting place.
Ghana Telecom announced – in a half page advert – that the area housing government ministry’s will have their service interrupted. This was to enable Telecom to carry out a “cabinet” cleaning exercise. The issue however is the duration of the interruption. 4 weeks!!! I wonder if this has anything to do with the large amounts outstanding on the ministry’s phone bills…. Time will tell – Oh yes – The interruption would commence on Monday 13th February 2006. The date published in the newspaper Thursday 23rd February 2006.
And finally – how not to get to heaven. Worshippers at the Seventh Day Adventist church in Brong Ahafo were shocked when a bailiff entered the church with a court order to lock up the church. A bailiff agreeing to take on the church is a brave man – or woman – indeed. A bailiff exercising a warrant to lock up a church while a church service is going on leaves the realm of brave and rapidly enters the realm of stupidity!
Methinks said bailiff will have some explaining to do when they look into the big book guarding the pearly gates.
And that dear reader is what grabbed me in the press today.
Needless to say I have a smile on my face.
I hope you have a hint of a smile as well….
Have a happy one!
1 Comments:
the mini bus thing reminds me of when that guy in swaziland wanted all people with aids to be branded on their foreheads. Maybe Ghana also needs a highspeed train ? ;)
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